Throughout the span of time mankind has pondered the secrets of the universe. Many theories have been created and deduced. Some of the mind boggling questions we have answered include, "Where does moon go at night?" "Why does Earth orbit the sun?" and "Why do humans feel the need to reproduce?". But there are still so many questions left unanswered, like "Coke or Pepsi?", "Why can't you forget how to ride a bike?" and so many more. One question we have finally answered , after decades of exploring, is: "Why are teenage girls so addicted to social networking?" (Ok so it hasn't been decades...)
Many great minds have been expended finding the answer creating many theories. Among these theories is a survival of the fittest theory of sorts. The theory states that on a subconscious level humans have the need to be the best, and teenage girls choose boasting and displaying their life as their means of doing so. When two lions meet each other they feel the need to fight over the lionesses and assert their dominance. Teenage girls fight over the teenage males by showing the other females how great they are by posting heavily doctored photos to the interwebs. Other females see these photos and are overwhelmed with envy. This process is what makes an "Alpha female" of sorts. This female is the one who has the most friends and followers on her networks. The other girls who privately stalk the alpha are constantly making their lives duplicates of hers trying to become the alpha and attract the boys.
Logic would dictate that people would use social networking for catching up with family and friends they actually know and don't get to see often. Upon questioning these girls they all claim they do exactly that, but upon surveying their profiles four of five teenage girls have never even met 87 percent of the people on their friends lists. These studies have definitely confirmed the suspicions of the scientist conducting the research.
After straining and exhausting thousands of great minds, it has been inferred that the only motivation these females have is simply to annoy their boyfriends. Many hours have been lost to the unrelenting onslaught of these tyrannical social networking females. After questioning masses of males who have fallen victim to this epidemic they have all agreed on this theory. However upon questioning females they all will defend their innocence. We males have agreed they are simply hiding their true motives.
